A confession

Everyone has a purpose in their lives. Many times that purpose keeps on changing. One day you don't feel like doing particular stuff and on some other day, you want that thing more than anything you wish for. Similarly, it could happen that one day you are darling of your group and some other time joke.

Some live their lives on that very moment not keeping in mind what's ahead or gone behind. I am among those who don't come in that category. For me, nothing lasts forever and I don't believe in temporary attachment. For me, if someone or something had given me some kind of happiness in my life, even it's for a moment then that lasts forever in my heart.

One thing which I never been able to explain but needed explanation about my behavior is in many ways I find myself divided into extreme two. One part stays with the thing or person which made me happy, but that's my inner self, it cares for that person; while another part just doesn't respond to that in an affectionate way. It shrugs it off very coldly. Now why shrug it off. it has various reasons. Reasons like that happiness are short-lived and followed by long unhappy moments. As I don't want to react to those unhappy moments thus to balance it out don't react to those happy moments, the way one expects to be.

There is one reason which hurts me more than any other. Some circumstances are there when I want to be there but that needs me to leave the rest of my things, following which practically declares me a dreamer. A dreamer who cares more about something which doesn't belong to him but very near to his heart. Something for which even his pain deserves less attention than that thing itself.

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