Sipher

“Which one will help me sleep?”, staring at all kinds of bottles in the showcase of that wine shop, being teetotaler I was struggling to pick one, not sure, which could be appropriate for the occasion. Before here, I was at a medicine store near my rented duplex. But then there, could not ask for sleeping pills. I was afraid, without a prescription, shop-owner may think I may be planning suicide. Now, it is one more thought, which got stuck in my mind with the rest of the ones. It’s already 1 pm, dressed for the office, yet not ready to leave for work. It’s been the third time this week, I could not leave. These thoughts just could not leave; just stays there, all the time looping in my mind, ever. I am unable to figure my way out, out from this maze; a maze of choices and consequences I have made and yet to make. After the sleepless night, holding that Can of Beer, for the last half an hour, I was not sure, will it work. Any possible way out I could think of was not able to conclude, ...

 I had nothing more to lose. That's why I was standing there, on that balcony, beside him, waiting for his reply. He was like a godfather to me. I mean literally, like Vito Corleone, in “The Godfather” movie; to whom no one could speak, before thinking ten times. We as a kid use to be afraid to say anything in front of him. I heard about his legacy from my mother; about her brother, about the man I am standing beside right now, at this balcony. He has built an empire of his own, from scratch, with his bare hands and empty pockets. “I want to go, I need that money”, I said. He said nothing as if he didn’t listen to me at all, or what I thought, not convinced. But then, I could not muster the courage to speak more, I already spoke unthinkable. I am already doing unthinkable, standing beside him, for the first time; talking to him like a man, to a man. I have to leave. Sometimes leaving is the only reason to go somewhere else. After 21 years, I am trying to break the imbecile cord. Th...